futaille | Open Post: Who invented this calendar anyway?

How unfortunate.

Yes, Grantaire was fully aware that the year being longer at the mansion would logically cause seasons to drift when someone kept track of the old calendar, or at least what had been pinned down as the old calendar for convenience sake, which was almost necessary when people's arrivals weren't necessarily tied to the day they left. He hadn't given it too much thought last year, when his birthday, such that it was, arrived in spring like he was used to.

Dark, though, was unfortunate. Not inappropriate for the next notable anniversary coming up, but for this one, not at all. Of course, it wasn't as if he would have been planning much in the way of an event, Dark or no, but it would have been nice to treat himself to something or other, regardless.

Instead, he has installed himself in the game room, where he is carefully balancing dominoes on their ends to make a domino rally on the billiards table. It's a nice large flat surface, so it should work nicely. Have to keep entertained somehow.

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From:

futaille

"Ah! Yes, my apologies. I am a rather distractable man¹. Starting with Dionysus then, although really it's almost irrelevant due to the aforementioned millennia of experience, as well as certain other talents. If he weren't already the god of Ecstasy, I might well have bestowed him with the domain myself. Still, that's beside the point. I'm sure it's somewhat obvious from their statuary, but did you know the ancient Greeks actually had small pricks as their ideal? Thought if it was too big, it indicated a certain barbarism and lack of thought. I think Dionysus himself is proof enough against that, and it also probably explains why he enjoyed spending time with satyrs."

¹This one's just true.

From:

quote_gentle_unquote

"Grantaire," says Susan, very seriously. And yes, she's leaning forward again, this time - again - on purpose. Her poor top button is in the struggle of its life. "Have we forgot to factor cock size into our barbarism-civilization scale? Ought we revisit it after this discussion? Ought we, perhaps, consider the use of one's mouth as a counterpoint? I imagine we might triangulate experiences with the latter in a tremendously clarifying way."

From:

futaille

As intended, Grantaire's attention is once more diverted. "Possibly. I think it probably fell out of favor as a metric when people realized they'd rather have civilization and large cocks."

From:

quote_gentle_unquote

"Though I do suppose size isn't everything," says the woman who has been primarily attuned to size this entire conversation. "There's nothing more tedious than a man with an enormous cock who hasn't the first idea how to use it to positive effect, and I suppose in the span of my own sexual history, I've been more frequently satisfied by women with clever fingers than a vast array of men."

Edited Date: 2025-07-07 12:11 am (UTC)

From:

futaille

"Women with... huh. I can... I would imagine that there's some degree of the advantage of familiarity, but yes, certainly, technique is far preferable to size alone... Is it possible to teach one's fingers to be more clever or is it inherent and instinctual talent?"

From:

quote_gentle_unquote

Even though Susan doesn't particularly alter her posture or her expression, at this last, her entire demeanor immediately shifts to evoking the feeling of a bowstring stretching a recurve to its absolute limit. "Oh, if one is willing to learn, I imagine he might be easily taught."

From:

futaille

"Any recommendations for finding a good teacher?"

From:

quote_gentle_unquote

"That depends," says Susan, who is palpably intent now. "An interested student ought to seek out a teacher who hasn't got any compunctions about being very, very specific in her guidance, and for whom he's got enough of an attraction that he remains eager for the duration of his lesson. Or, I suppose, lessons."

From:

futaille

"Specific guidance does tend to be very useful, yes. How many lessons does it usually take?"

From:

quote_gentle_unquote

"That, I think, depends on the student and how quickly he learns."

From:

futaille

"I see, I see." He has a bite of cheese. "Out of curiosity, do you teach?"

From:

quote_gentle_unquote

Susan sets her empty wineglass on the little table. "I do rather enjoy providing instruction." She licks her lips. "Would you like me to teach you?"

From:

futaille

"I do enjoy learning new things."

From:

quote_gentle_unquote

"Then I suppose I could be convinced."

From:

futaille

He nods. "I'll do my best then. Could you please agree to teach me? Think of the net benefit of having at least one more person in the world who knows what to do with their fingers."

From:

quote_gentle_unquote

"It would be value added, assuredly," says Susan, uncrossing her legs. "And I imagine if I were to remove my dress in the process, it would give your eyes a relief from the strain of trying to look down my top."

From:

futaille

He starts just a bit and his gaze raises a bit sheepishly to hers. "I have to admit the peek was remarkably compelling."

From:

quote_gentle_unquote

"Of course it was. I've got remarkable breasts," says Susan, pressing a hand to her chest. It only takes the slightest pressure on her top button to release it from its failing struggle to remain closed - the edge of it was already sinking through the buttonhole. "Is that any better?"